Did you know that there are 3 essential hurdles to clear if you want your relationship to succeed?
1# You must be physically attracted to your partner
This is the easiest and most obvious hurdle you need to clear before there can be any kind of spark between two people. This, however, is only the start. Many relationships do not make it beyond this point. If all a relationship revolves around is physical attraction, it is not likely to last very long. One needs to clear the other two hurdles as well.
2# You must like the personality of your partner and it helps if you are compatible in lots of ways.
It augurs well if you like the same kinds of things, like art, music, design, fashion and photography, for example. A shared passion can be a glue that helps you form a lasting bond with your loved one. If you can laugh until you cry about the same kinds of things and enjoy fun times together, that is a distinct plus. Your personalities can differ, but you both need to have the drive to work beyond individual differences and find the right arrangements to transcend them.
3# The hardest hurdle to cross is that of personal values.
I am talking about things like money, politics, religion, marriage, family and children.
One has to be fully committed to one’s partner to overcome the challenges of differing values. Compromises need to be negotiated and adhered to and it all has to be done with a positive approach. Sometimes this can be likened to climbing over a barbed-wire fence!
If you and your partner actually share most of the same values, that makes it a lot easier for a relationship to last.
How does one overcome these hurdles and not bail when things get tough?
1# Flip the hurdle sequence above.
You do this by considering personality and value issues right from the start. The attraction phase is intoxicating but by flipping the sequence you will save yourself a lot of time, pain and suffering.
2# Date the parents
“What? You must be joking!” is most probably your response. However, when you consider that when you marry someone, you actually marry their family too, this way of doing things makes a lot of sense.
You get to know somebody far quicker by being in the company of their family as well right from the start. Watching your beaux’s interactions with their parents and listening to all their stories will put you in the picture very fast and save you a lot of time. It will give you a good taste of the types of issues you will be facing in the future and help you make better and quicker decisions about how you are going to make your relationship last.
3# Practice acceptance
Love is a mysterious lottery and relationships are a test of acceptance. Practice accepting your partner with all his/her quirks, because, after all, you are not perfect either!
If your attempts at relationships have all failed before, I dare you to try this novel and enhanced approach. It will help you go deeper in your relationships and get mentally ready for the challenging hurdles that all couples face in merging their lives.
© 2021 Marilyn Welch. All rights reserved
Owner of Perfect Strangers
Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Introduction Society for Professionals and in the last year, many of the clients who joined Perfect Strangers met someone special, often within a very few short months. Would you love to meet your soulmate? If you fit our niche market and feel that you would like to work with me, register today.